My First Apartment

Moving for the 3rd time in my life was an epic moment, I wanted my own apartment for such a long time that when it finally worked out, I had 3 months of waiting and telling my parents that I was moving out. They fought me the whole way, some nights it was 1 or 2 in the morning with us arguing about this issue. I was 22 years old, but not at all sure of what I was made of or how I could handle my rule focused parents as they did not want me to move.  Looking back I am glad I had the "Balls" to finally move away, it was extremely hard at first, I had a thousand questions on how to survive in the real world, though it was 6 months before my parents spoke to me again. Although I wasn't deliberately trying to get them out of my life, I just knew that we needed some healthy space from each other as I needed to grow on my own.  Now I was clueless to most everyday things like rules and responsibilities. But it all left a big impact on my life as I faced it alone, determined to live in my very own place. I fell flat on my face many times, I was overcome by such deep fears once in awhile at night all alone. In truth I was never completely alone, I had many friends and even a thoughtful boyfriend, whose own father took me under his wing for advice and safety. I had to fight battles with my parents in hopes they saw things from my point of view only to have them cut me off for awhile. I have heard it said that to a child that the greatest fear is being disowned by their parents or not loved. I smile to myself when I heard this, saying out loud because I personally lived it "It is just fear, you don't lay down and die like you think you might...when your parents want nothing to do with you the bigger questions comes out and take over that kind of hurt. Asking of you to love not hate and always be very very brave!!! Because most importantly what I learned while living in my first new place, as I walked alone in the quietness of those empty walls, was how NO MAN is an ISLAND, we should always be there for each other no matter our faith and all the rules we may set up for ourselves.......Being alive and being there for another human is the greatest gift to give while we are still breathing!