It was one week after we laid Minnie to rest that I almost step on Sidda, for she was laying in the exact place Minnie always did. I had never seen Sidda do this so it truly surprised me as I said "What in the world is wrong with ya? You never lay here like that before?" Then I couldn't find her one afternoon for she was napping deeply in Minnie's crate, then I realized how she was laying in all the old places of Minnie. It was at the same time I thought she was very sick because she wouldn't get up in the mornings at all. In fact waking up to her by my feet was strange since I usually woke up with her by my face instead, Minnie's place on the bed was by my feet.....
In the last 2 years now Sidda has been very sensitive to sadness, especially my sadness as not a single day has gone by that I don't cry either first thing in the morning or late at night or any time through out the day, I am comfortable with my grief so I know I will this way for the rest of my life, yet having Sidda by my side has been a huge comfort! She knows that all she has to do is come to me as I cry and give me snuggles, she gives me paw pats on my wet cheeks and licks on my nose then she dances for me and I laugh through my tears. She gets me outside right away and she watches over me with such intent of hoping I will not cry anymore, it has worked like this in our routine that I know while we cried over Minnie she was deeply upset.
Sidda looked and listened for Minnie so clearly understood by us that we talked about how she would stand in the bedroom waiting and waiting to see Minnie run in from outside and jump into the bed first. Because Sidda always waited for Minnie to get into bed first so then she could get up and settled in after Minnie's bulldozing was over.
They did everything together with Minnie pushing herself first and with Sidda hanging back in watching and listening, since Minnie adapted to being deaf she would lay up next to Sidda so she could wake up from a nap by Sidda responding first. Sidda's sisterly care for Minnie was such a delight to watch, such a sweet companionship to witness. Our sweet Sidda gets along with anyone or any dog, I have admired her from the start! For even back in the days that I would dog sit her and she happily snuggled into Oscar I knew she was one of a kind little dog. Her sadness was a slow process in realizing after a week that Minnie wasn't ever coming back, she began to deeply grieve. It was a special kind of sadness for Sidda to look all over the home for her Minnie girl, to sleep in all the places that still had Minnie's smells lingering. To only go outside in late afternoon under the warmth of the high sun shine and to sink deep into my arms like she was defeated from worrying about where is Minnie to acceptance that Minnie isn't here anymore.
Oscar had no love for Minnie in the last 2 years so he bounced about the backyard while we played Frisbee and ran around until he was wiped out, He was concern for Sidda in her sadness and he would lay down to be at her level and play. She would soon be running a frenzy with him and loving life as spring returned to us all again.
Sidda's sadness was true to form just like herself in every way it was very sweet, she spent 2 weeks being clearly very sad and while she was sad I noticed how she still played with Oscar and the cats, then she would go back into Minnie's pillows, with a sigh, with a snuggle she would put herself deep into the very same place Minnie always laid.
Now Sidda has returned to her normal routine without Minnie up against her, without waiting to get into bed last so that Minnie won't step on her. Now she seems to be coming into her own space after grieving over Minnie to sweetly delighting over everything once again, I see in Sidda that she is playing more and napping better outside in warm spring sun, she isn't watching over Minnie anymore and so she really relaxes once again.
My heart is bursting with such love of my old pets, as I woke up this morning with Oscar by my hip, Tinker on my head and Jazzy on my chest and Sidda in my face as she should be!
All is well once again, All is well with our souls!
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