Suds In The Bucket

"She left the suds in the bucket and the clothes hanging out on the line."

I laughed the first time I heard this country song, "Suds in the bucket" by Sara Evans. Because it described my sister perfectly.

"Her folks should of seen it comin' it was only just a matter of time..." 

I nod with a proud smile remembering the strength my sister always had.

"Nothing quite like this has happened here before.."

She was ready to go, she was ready to be free! I missed her so much but deep down I knew, she was never meant to be caged and staged.

"Now her daddy's in the kitchen staring out the window, scratchin' and rackin' his brains. How could 18 years just up and walk away? Our little ponytail girl grown up to be a woman......Now she's gone in a blink of an eye."

   For my sister Dana, She didn't take shit from anyone, Turning 18 years old was just what she had been waiting for....AND She was waiting confidently, she tried about 4 or 5 times to run away before she was of age. She was NOT going to be told how to behave, or how to live her own life anymore. I tip my hat to her in all she had to do, in all she went through. Her spirit wasn't going to be broken, and most importantly her fire wasn't going to be put out! I love my sister, I admire her bravery and her spunk!

"She was in the backyard say it was a little past nine,

When her prince pulled up, White pick-up truck...."

That last night Dana was home with all her big boxes, with her new short hair cut dyed red. She was acting tough, acting so annoyed by my crying. "Listen Woman..." she said to me as I sat on her couch watching her get ready to move. I couldn't stop crying, I couldn't be happy for her...I just wanted her to stay close by me. Dana was strong and brave I leaned on her for these things I lacked in my own self.  "Listen Woman, I am not dead! You will see me again! I think it's time for you to grow up now." She didn't smile or hug me, she just looked at me like she expected me to stop crying. I was going to be lonely late at night after she was gone, when usually that was the time we hung out with each other. Her hanging lilac flowers over the bedroom door stayed there in honor of her, I smiled when ever I saw them and didn't allow anyone to take them down even 3 years later when I would finally leave. The next morning I was determined not to cry as Dana said her final goodbye. She was happy, she was at peace over getting out of there. She even hugged me without hesitation while saying "Be Brave Woman!" I chuckled and nodded right back at her for the last time, in our childhood. 

"No you can't fence time and you can't stop Love."