I had my favorite t-shirts hanging up in my best friend's closet, even my new cd player and my favorite books were tucked in the corner of her bedroom. My favorite thing of all was her dresser, she gave me the whole bottom drawer, for all my personal things. I truly loved my best friend Joanie! She was "my partner in crime" We were always there for each other. I slept over at her place 3 or 4 times a week. I was 19, and working at Mack's Fruit Stand. A mini grocery store with big open garage doors and pallets of produce for sale. (It was the best job I ever had) I also loved the freedom being 19 years old working full time and hanging out with my best friend. Most every night I slept over in my "Second Home" we were up until usually 3am, sometimes talking about "Plato's republic", school subjects, gossip or other family dramas. My own parents were busy with a whole new line of kids being born, They kept my curfew at 11pm even up to my age of 21. I, of course didn't question this, I just got around it by sleeping over at Joanie's place. One friday night while Joanie went to get some movies, her Dad was popping popcorn as I sat on the couch in my pajama pants all ready to stay there for the night. I called my mom to check in and let her know my plans. Mom replied "You aren't coming home tonight? But you haven't been here ALL week!" I could feel the edge in her voice as I replied quickly "I don't want to drive all the way home, I think we will have a movie night here." Mom sighed and I could tell I had to be careful to not make her feel neglected. "I will be home first thing tomorrow though." I hopefully reasoned. Mom's voice was soft suddenly and very thoughtfully she said "Your Dad has noticed you have been gone longer then usual and he is really missing you!" I sat up from my lunging position like I had been shot through the heart. "HE IS???" I replied suddenly not feeling so lazy after all. Mom chuckled "Why of course he misses you! He wants to know what is going on in your life and where you have been all week." My heart was melting like butter and I was already changing into my clothes "Ooooh that is so sweet, I will be RIGHT there! For I have so much to talk about!" I hung up quickly with one shoe on while hopping around as Joanie arrived with our movies and snacks. "I have to get home! my FATHER misses ME!" Joanie frowned while looking carefully at me "That doesn't sound like your father at all.....who told you this?" She asked as she followed me to my car, My heart was beating as I hurried "My Mom told me! Poor Dad he is actually missing me and wants me to come home!" I smiled happily as I raced off while Joanie called out "See you tomorrow then." I nodded as I stuck my head out my window calling "Can you believe it! my Father actually WANTS to talk to me!" There was a questioning smile on my best friend's face that I didn't take into consideration at the time.
That 30 minuet drive felt like forever, I realized several times I was speeding on the long straight country road. I burst into the house with such renewed and surprisingly strong energy. "Helloooooo Everyone!" Those little brothers of mine where just about to go to bed so I happily read and sang to them, Then I burst out into the living room where my father sat in front of the TV, "HI DAD! I AM HOME!" He nodded half smiling but staying seated in his chair, Mom was reading on the couch as she sat her book down. She seemed happy to see me. So I began to chat it up with all my excitement "...Then on Monday night we went to a midnight movie! I told Joanie I have never been so she took me and I didn't even know they had such a thing! We got hot chocolate at the truck stop when it was over, THAT was at 3am in the morning! CRAZY I KNOW! Isn't that so funny! I was thinking that there really is this whole other world at night out there! Have you ever heard of philosophy? I am learning about it because Joanie has to write a paper on it and I love helping her with her homework!" I stopped to take a deep breath I hadn't stop talking and sharing myself with my parents since I had sat down next to Mom. She smiled and listened glancing every so often at dad. I continued "We are learning to swing dance too! Joanie and I like all our new bible study friends, I think it is so much fun to actually know some Real dance moves! I hope I will get better with practice because I keep missing a step or 2 right now then I start laughing at myself over it and it only makes me mess up even more! I think Joanie is going to have a dance party in her own garage soon, Hopefully I can dance better by then....I wonder where swing dance started from? Do you know? I should find out... and did you know some people at church said dancing is a Sin? How crazy is that!?! I wonder where they came up that? what an idea even? At work today I was thinking about it even more and I think....." THAT was right when my father exploded. He couldn't take it anymore. "ENOUGH!" He shot up from his chair and pointed his finger at my surprised face "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" I stared on in shock for I was caught off guard, I thinking I was just visiting with my parents at this moment, I wanted to connect with them so much. Dad walked away while mom hissed at him "Del now she was just catching up on her week away from home, it's nothing to shout about." she smiled back at me as I sat shocked silent, then mom shook her head as if to say "Don't worry about it," When Dad coming back to his seat while carrying a glass of OJ, said stiffly "Debby you need to know when to Shut up! especially while others are watching TV. You need to STOP talking!" He sat back down rolling his eyes. I nodded bravely wondering if he thought I was so stupid at this moment again.I had a lump in my throat that was choking me so as I glanced back at my mom, she had begun to read again acting like nothing was wrong anymore. I quickly scrambled my way out of the house while wiping my eyes as I walked across the yard to my dark bedroom. I knew deep down in my heart and soul that my father didn't miss me, didn't want to chat it up with me.....How much longer was I going to let myself fall into such manipulation? Such false hope over and over again? I wished I had stayed sitting on my best friends couch for truly only fools rush in....... AND I had been made a FOOL.
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