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Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Our Roommate

I completely understand why everyone keeps asking how is living in our new place with a roommate going, a rather odd situation to move into a place with a young man already established upstairs. I never really was concerned but I live in my own world also....Maybe I am not a good judge of such things. The first night our roommate returned home after we had moved in, I was wide awake listening to the moments in the dark house at One am, my 3 dogs didn't make a sound! They just laid into me a bit more closer snoring, knowing I was watching over them. My husband Tony suddenly spatted out "What in the World, the hell is wrong with these dogs?!?" JUST as I whispered at the very same moment "Good doggies!" I was very proud there was no alarm barking or actions from them, Tony now sat straight up explaining "WE COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED IN OUR SLEEP! Bad Doogies! Bad! WAKE UP and Bark for shit's sake!" I was giggling at his panic, I sat up to pet each sleeping pup.....
THIS is how different we are, I look at the silence of the dogs on that first night with our roommate getting home as a triumph of good dog behavior while Tony felt it was wrong. He said our dogs should be growling or warning us someone was IN our home. Although He has come a long ways in over the last 2 months trying to understand our roommate or not taking things so personal, my husband has never had a roommate before. A fact that was clear to me right away, so I have had a few conversations and discussions on the kind of rules in having a roommate.
Every so often I think it's odd, having a roommate who doesn't talk much or hang out with us, I like clear cut conversations and honesty so when I get a vibe that I'm the only one talking or sharing the week's events I remind myself that we are all different peoples around here. To me when I leave home for a while it's important everyone knows my plans, our roommate is more of the disappear with no goodbye chat then pops back in at random. I am trying not to compare my mannerisms, for I know exactly how I am. Like in house cleaning I am my own person, comfortable no matter what to just clean!! and I will not change my ways now for whoever I live with, a clean home IS my home. I own it, I will not wait on anyone else to do the work for me, I don't take it personal if the dishes are not mine to wash or the bathrooms need touch ups. I love my homemaking self, it's not that bad sharing a home when I am the type of person to care over people, never ignore them unless of course they WANT to be ignored. My wonder at having a roommate is more in how can I talk honestly without being misunderstood or left to guess at how I sounded? When my roommate was cuddling with his girlfriend on the couch one evening I tried not to invade their space as I quickly raced outside meeting my husband already there, He saw me looking for something to do in my awkwardness saying out loud from the lawn chair "I shall think of this home as student housing..." Then I laughed so hard shaking my head at our new place. Adjustments, challenges or understandings are all apart of life, now in our new home we are making everything work out just fine. YET I'm always ready for THAT look each person gives me when they ask "SO how is living with the roommate?" The looks make me chuckle in my reply, I always answer in the same way each time as well, "He's never really around, he's not much for chatting so for all I know everything is just fine..." How funny it is, for unless actually spoken to directly trying to figure people out or ever knowing they might be mad at me isn't something I worry over, it's just the way I am again in my own world until given more knowledge to work with. So unless anything changes the story of our roommate is; that he's a young man who lives here but also has a kind, sweet girlfriend who he is with more, and it's quite naturally a good setup all around! At least so far that is what I know:-}

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