Not a day goes by that I don't cry, but I do notice how I laugh, how I get focused on new ideas and new things to do. How I admire and delight in those around me when we come together. But I sure do like my own space, my own time to be sad or to feel my whole life live on within me.
I notice how I live, how I think and feel all the time, yet in June I have arrived. I am just present in the moments outside and under the stars, I feel closer to happiness I think.....maybe my joy comes from my grief, for I deeply loved that Gemini sky!
My 30's sure where very tough hard years, I was so happy on the day I turned 30.
Of course I had no idea the traumas that would haunt me in the next 10 years............
Yet among all of it where the laughter, the love and the good times still, I see my 40's in a much different way now in the happiness of being older I see a deeper respect for the next 10 years ahead.
I will not waste my time among the bullshit, and I will always LOVE fully my whole life time no matter what that looks like in the end because Sadness has taught me what's it all worth to me now.
This June has been so beautiful, so reflective and full of family connections. I am in awe of how fast it went by in my tears, in my reminiscing of loosing my best friend and in celebrating my brother's birthday. June is always going to be so bittersweet, so perfect is the weather to help me live again.
Not a day goes by that I don't long to have every month be June!
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