I get discourage sometimes trying to keep her from spending to much, knowing that in every penny saved my father would be proud of me or at least thankful that I am not a shopaholic as well. It's my mother's focus to go out and spend his hard working money in order to get back at him for always being at work. In which no one wins through such a battle, NOT spending all his money would allow him to finally take a day off and simply be at home with her like she really wants.......yet when I explained this to her a year before her stroke she freaked out on me and got so upset saying "I'm not going to wait around for him to finally stop working all the time! I'm going to have FUN with his money instead!" I chuckled shaking my head knowing exactly why she felt that way, then after her stroke she filled her shopping cart with anything and everything she saw or wanted that was a true moment of things have all changed in her as my father even showed up to help us not spend 300 dollars on clothes that clearly didn't fit her to begin with.....LIFE is an adventure for us all, my father is always running the numbers in his head, always feeling panicked to get back to work or stay on his phone until he has his jobs under control. He gets annoyed and worn out dealing with my mother now as we reach 4 years since her brain trauma.
My Mom insisted "Pick some hand towels,I like this one." I handle through the Easter towels reading "Hello Spring!" stitched into the fabric. I smiled explaining "I am always saying this! It's such a fun exciting time of the year to get back into spring." My mother nodded then dug through her purse for coupons, I helped her out with my extra hands thinking to myself how different her life is from mine in that I never like using coupons, never like hanging out in the mall or never like walking through each aisle of a store all afternoon long.
My Mom and I ate lunch together again, enjoying the warmer weather and planning on how to decorate the gifts baskets when we got back home. She explained "I just don't want to run out of time in getting these done, I feel so frustrated when Easter arrives and I don't have everything PERFECT." I chuckled replying "You say the same thing a about Christmas, doesn't it get expensive year after year?" Mom replied "I told your Dad to sell some land for extra money." I choked on my water glass and explained back "Just for Easter Baskets???" She giggled explaining "Noooooo, for traveling and well, everything I want to do!" I shook my head at her saying "If you saved your money for only one holiday celebration then you would have some for doing the fun things you would like." She shared "When I was normal I went to the stores whenever I wanted and bought stuff on sale all year long! AND I got some really great deals and good stuff too! But now I never know when I will be in the store again so I better buy it right now or I'll be kicking myself later for not grabbing it when I could!" I nodded drinking my ice water listening feeling a bit worn out by her shopping hobby. "Maybe our next shopping trip could be at garden center and we could plant some flowers around your cottage?" I suggested quickly Mom frowned shrugging "I guess, it's hard for me with just one hand to garden anymore." I pipped up "I would help you of course." realizing as we talked just why we were stuck in going shopping every time I came to see her...because she didn't struggle with her parallelization when strolling along all the holiday displays! It made sense now with me as I've been trying change our habits together.
I kindly said to my mom "We'll sit outside more now the weather is nicer and I want to take you to the Botanical Gardens where we could stroll through so many garden wonders!" Mom smiled "That could be fun maybe!" I laughed at her sweet honesty, HELLO SPRING!
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