When I was born it was a January cold winter day in Northern Idaho surrounded by pine trees and the mountains. The snow covered small town of St.Maries was full of the scent of fresh cut lumber from the logging Mill. The moment I drew my first breath, the second my life force thrived...I was seeking LOVE. I was alive as an infant but my journey to understanding the Mystery of life and how Love was the most important desire in us all had JUST begun.
When My father handed me the riffle I instantly started shaking uncontrollably. "Now you have to hold still." He said alarmed watching me stumble. "no." I whimpered I was young maybe 8 or 9 years old but saying No to my Father was like trying to out race a Cop car for you would have to be a real dumb-ass to do so. He set it up under my arm talking me and my Sister through out all the steps. With tears rolling down my cheeks he kept at it trying to assure me I was safe. But it wasn't my own life I was crying for....
There was not one moment with God's Shining light that came down through the clouds saying "Debby, Go forth and shoot!" At least I was looking for a sign like that out in the windy mountain side. My Dad had put all his empty Dr. Pepper soda cans up as our shooting targets. He seemed so excited,so happy to be teaching us how to shoot, how to hold a heavy rifle. My chest hurt when that scary sound of my rifle went off I was totally hysterical by this time. My Father never puts up with any panicking, screaming or hysterical females...it was always discussing to him like only stupid people would behave that way. But for this moment I never forgot how nice he was to me, in letting me go sit in the Truck so I could stop crying. He watched me like the freak I felt I was when I held the gun in my hands. As soon as I was alone in the cab watching my younger Sister take to shooting like she was drawing a new picture. I realized I had failed in my first test of "Manhood".....As a Woman, Now I shall master the talent of Love, since that day so long ago I have never held a gun again. I couldn't live with myself if I took a life, if I disrespected nature, or threaten the beauty of this world. There is a reason why every living being wants to be loved, We need each other.
A True Warrior walks with their hands up, lives with understanding that the real power comes from protecting the world.
"Starting Today help us love ourselves so much that we never setup any circumstances that goes against us. We can live our life being ourselves and not pretending to be someone else just to be accepted by others."
When I discovered unconditional love I was starving for it like some homeless teenager, I was seeking, longing and believing all things were possible. My childhood religion had blossomed in to my own personal quest to seek God and receive that Unconditional Love. When I read about how to master Love I realized the starving need in me came from the deep lack of love I had for myself. Like the example of a kitchen when a person has it stock full with food then sharing and inviting people to eat with them is so easy. But if the kitchen is empty, desperately hungrily that person with no food will do anything for a bite, for that need to be fulfilled. So the empty kitchen leaves that person living on the terms of other people. In the same way we seek love like food we long to be completed and not left desperately lonely. When you have love in who you are it's easy to share, it's so easy to give that extra step towards another person.
When you Master Love, you open the door to a new world, to a new life.
"When we fulfill the needs of our mind and our body, our eyes see with love. We see God everywhere."
For this is the power of LOVE, The world isn't a scary place when you understand that you hold a gift in your own life. You are the beautiful creature like that deer in the forest, the dolphin in the sea or the eagle of the sky. How then could you take your own life? By being apart of what ends the connection? How could we not have hope for all things Bright and Beautiful?
Living with Love is the calling of our soul and the reason we are born.
"You can only perceive the beauty that lives outside you when you FEEL the beauty that lives inside you."
When I turned 30 years old I realized my love was limited by the conditions I put on other people to understand love. Ironically I had a list of conditions for my Parents in how they should love me. How they should treat me. When I realized this I laughed till I cried because it was right in front my face how I wasn't loving them unconditionally. Now I felt so silly for being a Love warrior when I kept wanting my parents to love me. Now I see Love will always win, my love for my parents has set me free from even their own conditions.
"Just imagine if all the humans could start being truthful with themselves, start forgiving one another and start loving everyone. If all the humans loved in this way they would no longer be selfish. They would be open to give and receive, They would no longer judge one another."