It was June of 2003 when my friends through together a bridal shower for me, the event was held at my future mother-in-law's freshly built perfectly setup patio home.
That adorable home back then held such good times and such good laughter in wonderful memories.
My Bridal shower was very stylish, the gifts were all so clever and fun too.
And then there was a game, I sat front and center to everyone joking, laughing and visiting...a circle of women in wisdom and advice made the whole afternoon fly right by! Then there was a game of answering questions about my soon-to-be husband, Tony Shively.
I honestly thought that I had this game in the bag as we began, I was just so sure that I would never have to put a marshmallow in my mouth at all.
As question one was asked; What is his favorite color? I answer with a smirk "Purple." Wrong! it's Green.
I suddenly had a huge marshmallow in my mouth "Wait? wait? What the hell? GREEN??? ....since when....!?!"
What's His favorite movie? I answered quickly "Shawshank Redemption." and they give me another marshmallow
Wrong again! "It's French Kiss."
I started to mumble my protest as they ask "What's his favorite song?" Oh thank god for an easy question, I can recover from this I know I can! "Mr. Jones by County Crows." Wrong! It's Lauren Hill's "Killing me softly." I squeal out my protest and confusion, as I now can't really talk with 3 big marshmallows stuck in my mouth......this isn't working out for me after all! in the end I only had one right answer...only one!
I couldn't believe it, I kept saying "How could I date someone for 4 years and NOT know these answers to such important questions????"
When I confronted Tony later on this issue, he seemed so surprised that those answers were used for a game, he even added "I forgot what all my favorite things are....I just answered these questions fast enough to be done with it and to be left alone again."
I laughed till tears rolled down my cheeks "of course he did." I felt so unnerved by the event that I had to ask him "Soooooo I DO know who you are after all???? Because I thought I would win that game and it kicked my ass! or YOU kicked my ass I guess, I mean really this wasn't all in my head? I had the right answers after all???"
He replied back with annoyance "Games like that are stupid, what does it prove in the end? that you shouldn't get married because you don't know each other's favorite color? How dumb, how ridiculous that they embarrassed you like that!" I protested "I wasn't embarrassed, I was surprised! For we SHOULD know these things about each other, it's apart of paying attention to the other person in your life....making sure that what you feel is important is also importnat to your partner." He snorted back "Oh come on, everyone changes their favorite color or add new movies to their list, to make some one declare an absolute answer is trying control or limit them." I react back "YOU didn't have everyone watching you stuff 9 marshmallows in your mouth! and I KNEW all the right answers! I really did! I kept trying to explain to everyone something was wrong here! My god, so You just decide to go all random and not be "limited" in your answers...it nearly choked me to death!"
I stopped in mid action with my arms up in the air as I had a clear cut thought come to me so I shared it aloud "THIS is exactly what marriage is like, This is the truth of 2 very different always changing people under the same roof trying not to control the answers to any game life throws at ya! I guess we keep it real."
Tony smiled, nodding his approval "That's my girl!" he said as I rolled my eyes groaning back "I'll never be able to look at a marshmallow the same way again...it's now that symbol of "Wrong answer." with me saying "Ooooh for shit's sake!" in all that sugary slobber!"