Lauren Daigle - Rescue

I walk in the light.
I think of the good things God has given me.
I am struggling with finding my worth, my value and my purpose.
I have lost everything, my husband left then our home came crumbling down after him.
I stayed awhile in the hospital deeply broken, and crushed into tiny pieces. 
I dreamed of an army coming through the darkness....
          ......I walk in the light, full of hope that God has saved me!

Elton John - Your Song

Today is the celebration of love.

Tony and I never missed a valentines day.
We celebrated our love last year by cooking a nice meal from shopping together playfully at the Boise Co-op. We had donuts with coffee there after getting all our favorite things. 
That day was spent being cozy in our home with good foods cooking up with so much love.....just one year ago.

We never missed Valentines day for 20 years.

Tony and I believed in honoring all the holidays, in keeping traditions and sharing our lives. 

 .....Then the day came that Tony couldn't take it anymore, he told me that he had a girlfriend and he wanted a divorce.
My whole world came crashing down, it will never be the same ever again. For I loved him fully and completely, we got married to this song and shared in such an awesome marriage! 
I will miss all that we had...this is the first V-day without him...but

I will always celebrate and honor love.

Lauren Daigle - You Say

Today I turn 41 years old.

I still believe my 4th decade will be amazing, it will be full of celebrating life!
I still have a joyful soul and happy spirit after having been crushed, and so badly broken.
I still choose good after living through such evilness, my husband said he saw evilness in our backyard while he was high on mushrooms and I was alarmed by that so I said a little prayer to rid the evilness from my land yet it consumed my home destroying everything in the end.

I am so grateful that God was with me through it all.

I see God's wonders and awesomeness in everything beautiful for my future!   
Thank you Jesus for conquering evilness so that we can celebrate new life every new day!

My Everyday

Where ever my husband and I lived or stayed I called it home even if it was just a week long rental by the Coeur d'alene lake. 

My husband, HE was my home.

The years of a shared life had moments of great delight. When he would panic or freak out over something I would be calm and encouraging then when I would freak out he would take charge and all was right with the world when we were together, when we were home. The holidays have been so hard this year as the first without my husband, my home.
My everyday life was once so strong and focused because he was there in all the big and little ways we shared our lives.
I truly lived for the evenings he came home from work to tell me all about it and eat together wonderful meals I had cooked up! 

(I had hoped his crush on his co-worker was temporary, just a phase he was going through as he came obsessed with his work and talking about her all the time, he was my whole world so I gave him all my trust and credit to be home more with me)

Now I am in transformation.
I have to become at home with just myself since I lost the compass and the love I lived by with him at my side in my everyday life.....

These first holidays without my home are the hardest days I have ever lived through, but I know in the new year there are new possibilities that I am ready for!

My Life, my Heart

My Life, My heart and my baby boy! 13 years old and helping my husband get through this divorce in good dog style! I am so proud of him!

My Heart

No matter where you go or where you are.....Know this, you will always be in my heart. 

I thought you were my hardest goodbye ever but there are no goodbyes with us.

For I hold you close to my heart no matter what.

20 years have given me such depth of love and friendship for you.

                        May you have a spectacular life!                                

Life of 20 years

We started dating 1999

2002

I married my best friend.

2003

2004

2005

2006

2007

2008

2009

2010

2011

2012

2013

2014

2019

2017

THE END